It's Not a War Zone 1

I do not own Wreck it Ralph or the characters. Disney does. Written with co-author hippo-scuba

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Chapter 1

She still didn’t fully believe she was doing this, being pretty much forced to move into a place like this. A small town, a quiet apartment building, knowing no one in the area. That last part didn’t make much of a difference. She didn’t really know anyone anymore, at least none that she would hang out socially with. Looking up at the apartments in front of her she sighed.

Calhoun was a tall, even for a woman standing around 6 foot; blond hair cut short partially covering her ice blue eyes. She held a box under her right arm, it wasn’t a particularly heavy item, and the rest of her stuff was arriving in the morning. These were just the necessities. Running her free hand though her hair she climbed the short set of stairs to enter the building. She already had the info to her new apartment, having been given the key earlier that day by the person who had arranged her living there.

After what she had gone to today, being put on hiatus, flown out overnight on a plain from the base overseas that she was originally stationed at and having to settle into a town she knew nothing about. She had seen her new appointed therapist as soon as she arrived; she was scheduled to see him twice a week. Being forced to listen to him spout nonsense like ‘she was safe’ and ‘there was nothing she could have done’ like she was some insane person. She knew she was safe.

The lobby was quiet, which she was fairly thankful for. She was tired, wanting nothing more at the moment then going into her apartment and laying down. Her bed wouldn’t arrive until the next morning, but she had slept in worse places then on the floor. Finding the elevator easily located at the back of the lobby, she hit the up button and waited for it to reach the lobby.

The Niceland apartment complex was nothing special, but to Felix it was home. He loved tending to the needs of the tenants, and making sure that everything in the building was in tip-top shape. Not to mention the fact that he was always near two of his very best friends – Ralph and Vanellope.

The two siblings couldn’t have been more different from each other. One, a huge, hulking man standing well over 6 feet (probably leaning closer to 7, now that he thought about it) – and the other, a small and diminutive little girl of 9-years, who was no higher than 4”5’. They were an odd pair, but boy, they sure were fun to hang around with.

Despite the fact that they were always on each other’s case for one reason or another.

This moment was no different, as the trio was currently locked away in the darkened room of Ralph’s apartment with nothing but the flickering blue glow of the television in front of them to light the room.

“No, dummy! We’re supposed to be working together!” The little girl exclaimed, raising her controller into the air. “I press A, then you press B! It’s all very simple, Ralph.” The child sat back into the large couch she was sitting on and rolled her eyes, repositioning the controller in her hands once again with a huff. It would appear that they were in a very heated game of Mario Party.

Ralph shot her a half hearted glare out of the corner of his eye. “I am pressing that! It’s not my fault you weren’t in the right place when I did it.” He tilted the controller slightly as he played, his eyes directing back to the screen.

Try as he might, Vanellope was always better at games like this then him, though he was no slouch at it himself. But sister or not he never willingly let her win, well not often that is. The two of them lived alone in the apartments, which he was sure Vanellope loved, not having to listen to their parents as they rarely visited. They were usually too busy anyway.

“Oh yeah, blame me.” Vanellope rolled her eyes and turned back towards the screen with a new look of determination. She stuck her tongue out of her mouth slightly, and her eyes narrowed towards the screen. A melodious jingle sounded that signaled the end of the game sounded from the television but a moment later, and the girl threw her controller into the air and sat back into the couch with crossed arms. “Way to go, stink brain!”

Felix, who had been sitting on the floor in front of the couch laughed and placed his controller on the ground. He, like Ralph, wasn’t the best when it came to these newer games – but it always seemed easier to win when the two were in the midst of an argument.

“Good game.” He told them with a grin, to which Vanellope just huffed again and stared at the still-flickering screen in an angry pout. That was his cue. Pushing himself up into a standing position, he turned to face them and repositioned the hat that was on his head. He was still /technically/ on-duty, and had only decided to take a little break to spend time with his two friends. “Well, I’d better get back to work.” He told them with a sheepish grin, pointing over his shoulder back towards the door. “Will I see you guys tonight?” He asked the two hopefully as he made his way over to the door.

“Yeah, yeah.” The pouty child answered back. Oh, Ralph was going to get it for making them lose again.

Running a hand through his messy hair he gave Vanellope a look. “Oh yeah, it’s always my fault, kid. If you didn’t keep distracting me maybe we would have won!” He wasn’t overly concerned with winning, it was just a game after all but when they lost as a team she would always start something. They had been at it for a while before Felix showed up, so standing up he stretched, working out his stiff muscles.

He wore a set of overalls and a plaid shirt underneath. Luckily for him he didn’t really have anywhere he needed to go today so they had just been relaxing. “Yeah, just stop by when you get everything finished.” Ralph knew he had a job to get back to; it tended to keep his friend pretty busy on certain days.

“Great! See you!” The maintenance man replied cheerfully, opening the door and closing it behind him to allow himself out into the hall. It was somewhat of a relief to avoid another Ralph vs. Vanellope moment, but he knew the two only ripped on each other all the time because it was easier than showing ‘feelings’. Which, he was still unsure why that was such a big deal.

He disregarded the thought with a shrug, and pulled out a small piece of paper from his pocket, glancing down at it. It was a list of the various stops he had to make among the apartment that day. Complaints that tenants had made regarding things that needed repairing, and just general occurrences.

One in particular stood out, and that was the arrival of a new tenant; and while he was normally shy by nature, he prided himself on making the apartment a very welcoming environment. So he always liked to go up and see how the newbies were settling in.

As the elevator arrived, Calhoun moved inside of it, hitting the button for the 7th floor. When the doors closed she leaned back against the rear of the elevator and waited for it to climb. She wore casual military attire, having come from the base earlier. Baggy camouflage pants and a green wife beater and despite her being on leave, she still had her dog tags hung around her neck though at the moment they were hidden in her shirt. Reaching the 7th floor the elevator produced a ‘bing’ as the doors opened.

Stepping out she reached into her pocket, pulling out a piece of paper with her key wrapped inside of it. Using her free hand she opened it up and read the numbers ‘804’, her apartment number. Glancing around, she found that she was currently at 700 with an arrow going up pointing to her left. Figuring she wasn’t far from it now she headed down the hall to her apartment.

Finally finding her door she turned the paper over in her hand, taking the key between her fingers as she reached forward to unlock her door. It was indeed a little awkward with the box in her hand but she was almost inside.

Focusing more on fitting the key in the lock and not dropping the box, she hadn’t noticed the handyman behind her until he spoke. Her body tensed at the surprise as her body reacted as if on her own. The 15+ hour flight from Afghanistan yesterday into this morning, the therapist and driving here from the base had her nerves a little frazzled with lack of sleep and frustration.

‘Room 709’, he read to himself, and headed to the elevator. It let him out at the 8th floor, and to his surprise, he was greeted with an unfamiliar woman holding a box. That must have been her. He grinned and walked quickly to close the space between them, and coming up behind her, he asked “Do you need help with that, miss?”

In one smooth motion she dropped her box, brought her leg up which connected with his stomach sending him back into the wall of the hallway behind her. Spinning around she pulled a small hand gun out from the back of her cargo pants, aiming it at his chest as she kept him pinned to the wall with her free hand. “What do you want?” Her voice was sharp, a bit of a wild look in her eyes. The Sergeant wasn’t one to like surprises, that was for sure.

Before he could even process what was happening, a swift foot connected with his stomach and sent him all but flying into the wall behind him. He grunted on impact, and opened his eyes wide in shock, letting out a surprised yelp when he saw the gun, and holding his shaking hands out towards her in a gesture of surrender.

He certainly hadn’t seen that coming.

“I-I’m Felix, ma’am! I’m the superintendent!” He said frantically, looking up to meet her gaze in a panic, “I – ohh…” he trailed off when his worried eyes locked onto her piercing blue ones, and despite the situation, he smiled a little. “Your eyes…” he began, losing himself for a moment, “They’re amazing.” He droned out dreamily, leaning forward slightly and apparently forgetting the fact that she had a gun pointed at him.

She glanced him over slightly, not quite believing him right away, she wasn’t an overly trusting person with people she didn’t know. Her eyes narrowed slightly at his words but she slowly lowered the pistol, switching the safety back on as she tucked into the back of her cargo pants again. There was a bit of uncertainty in the back of her mind. She had just pulled a gun on the super of the building. This may turn out to be a short living arrangement after all.

“Flattery doesn’t charge these batteries. State your business.” She crossed her arms over her chest as she took a step back to look down at him, the box she had dropped a moment ago lay forgotten on the floor by her door along with her key.

“Oh,” he took a moment to clear his throat as she stepped away from him, and took off his hat – both as a sign of respect, and so that he could have something to nervously ring in his hands. “I… just saw that you were having trouble with that box there, and thought I would help,” he pointed quickly to the box that had previously lay forgotten at their feet. “You just moved in, didn’t you?” He asked shakily, though he already knew the answer.

He prided himself on the fact that he was on relatively good terms with many of the tenants. Though this woman, he had never seen before; and despite her stunning outward appearance, managed to be more than a little intimidating. Not that it would stop him from welcoming her to the building. The fact that she had a gun might have been a problem though.

His mannerisms and appearance didn’t much say that he was a threat to her, so she rolled her shoulders slightly as she forced herself to relax. Her reaction was something she needed to work on or it could get her into more trouble then she may already be in.

“Thanks for the offer, but I can manage.” Turning away from him she picked up her box and the key again. “Yes…I just got in this morning.” Shifting her weight she rested the box on her hip as she turned to look at him again.

“Well, welcome!” Felix greeted, placing his hat back on his head. He was beginning to relax again after the whole ‘gun-scare’. She didn’t seem all that confrontational anymore, so he just assumed that he had taken her off-guard or something. “If you need anything, I’m down on the first floor. 103. Stop by anytime.” He told her, taking a step back towards the elevator. “If I’m not there, I’m probably in 216 with a couple of my friends. So just knock!” He grinned, glancing down towards the box she was carrying again. It didn’t seem like much, for someone who was just moving in. “Are you sure I can’t offer you any help?”

Calhoun nodded slightly at his words. “..I’ll keep that in mind.” Despite what her therapist said, she doubted she would go seeking him or anyone else for that matter anytime soon. All she could think about now was getting inside her new apartment and resting, maybe taking a shower.

She watched him, unsure what to really make of him. He sure seemed to be the helpful type, but why would he try to be so helpful to someone he doesn’t even know? What would he want in return? “This is all I have for right now, my other things aren’t coming till tomorrow so its fine.”

“Well alright, ma’am – I hope you settle in fine.” He tipped his hat to her and turned to make his way back to the elevator. He opted to take the stairs this time, and opened the door leading to the stairwell. He looked back at her for a moment, and couldn’t stop the dreamy grin from spreading across his face. Though he caught himself this time, and ducked into the stairwell before she could see him. Or so he hoped.

He brought out his list again and took another glance at it. There was a pipe in the basement that had apparently burst and needed to be looked at, so he figured he’d go take care of that before meeting up with Ralph and Vanellope later that night. Though as he did, he couldn’t get the thought of that woman out of his mind. She sure was something else.

She watched after him for moment before moving back to her door to unlock it. He sure was different, that was for sure. Not many people, the soldiers she commanded included could take a loaded gun being pointed at him and recover that fast. Finally getting the door open, she looked inside briefly before she found herself glancing in the direction the handyman had gone.

The look he was directing at her wasn’t something she was entirely unused to, but it wasn’t like it normally was. Most men only had one thing on their mind, but that look she had just caught was something different entirely. Shaking her head slightly she headed into her apartment.